Saturday, April 30, 2005

Unhinged

I've always thought that word is more evocative of feeling at loose ends more than crazy. I'm feeling at loose ends. I can't quite get my head around the fact that we're not going back this time. I should have figured that out from the lovely treatment we got at the airport with our one way tickets.
"You have been chosen by the airlines for additional security screening" said the nice 14 year old TSA worker. I had a hard time not yelling "Oh My God. REALLY! US?!?" and jumping up in down with glee while looking up for the balloon drop. We had been chosen! This must be how Jews feel All. The. Time.

It actually wasn't so bad. the worst part was that once they pulled us over into into the little special screening area, they had to shut down the security line since he was the only TSA guy working our line. Actually, thinking back on it, it was probably a good thing. I had 3 TSA workers to myself - and Miles' self - and they didn't want me messing with our stuff so I had a ton of help getting the boy, the bag, the stroller and the car seat through security. And what's a pat-down between friends?

I was friendly throughout except the woman who came out of the metal detectors behind us. we were in our own special area waiting for the "FEMALE SCREEN" to come over and feel me up when this nut bag gets right in Miles' face (and subsequently mine since I was holding him) and says "ooooh, what was the baby hiding in his jammies? What did the little cutie do to get pulled out?" I had no idea what to say to this woman. Normally I would have said cheerfully, "Cocaine! He had cocaine in his widdle jammies!" but I didn't want to go along with her bizarre joke and bring the wrath of the TSA upon us nor did I want to be ultra-serious in denying he was hiding something, because, well, c'mon, that would really be suspicious. So I just said, 'ha. yeah. ha.' Miles had the good sense to look at her like she was an insane talking flounder and he just clung harder to me.

So. right. we're here, in the hotel and we're not going back. hmmm.

Today I saw a pumping oil derrick in the parking lot of a convenience store.

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